How to lead your children?
Being a father and a mother, I can relate to
all the questions on parenting about how to lead your children. When you are
struggling to keep control of your children's lives, it is a struggle that can
make parenting stressful and draining.
Many times we may not be at our best during
those times with our children because we are too preoccupied with worries about
our relationship with our children. We worry about things we shouldn't be
worrying about. All this leads to a stressful situation for both parents and
children.
This can be a basic problem when you are a
father and a mother. How do you lead your children when your communication
skills have been declining for years?
You see, one of the biggest concerns parents
have is how to nurture their children without diminishing their independence.
The thing is, when you lose your communication skills, you are going to be a
real challenge for your children to deal with.
Be honest, how many times have you gone to
them, and said something that they didn't like? How many times have you done
that without explaining your reasoning for what you did? How many times have
you told them what they should be doing and left it up to them to fix the
problems?
Now, you don't want to encourage your children
to think that everything they do is wrong. What you want to do is instill in
them some sense of self-respect. They need to feel that they can set their own
goals for themselves and you can help by saying things like, "If you are
having a bad day, go get me a snack."
You want to support them and encourage them. By
helping them find ways to deal with their problems, you are encouraging them to
see the positive side of life. They need to learn that they can set their own
goals.
Now, don't forget that we adults will get
distracted by life and times are constantly changing. The same applies to
children.
If you let them know that you are going to be
busy, but there is a way you can be involved, they will appreciate it and
cherish the time you spend with them. You can help them by saying things like,
"I am going to be home from work in two hours, you have a problem to
discuss?" Most of the time, they won't say no.
For the most part, you can follow this type of
scenario and use it as a good example. You can tell them that they are going to
be able to discuss their problem with you in just two minutes. That way, you
don't need to be home to answer their questions.
So, take some time to work on how to lead your
children. Use your communication skills with them. Show them that you
understand that they have to know that they are going to be able to voice their
concerns to you.
Take care of your children and yourself. Learn
to communicate with them and understand that you have to be able to deal with
their issues on their own time. It may be frustrating, but it is best for both
of you to know that you can deal with their problems without your children
feeling frustrated and needing to do the same thing on their own.
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